“My team has analysed reports from the HiEyes,” said Kydd. “And I believe they’ve tracked down who took the Stick. Have a look at this.” The screen was blank. “Ah, they may have mistakenly programmed a negative heuristic there. One moment.” He tinkered with the keys.

“We are in your capable hands,” said Jinx. It gave him an enormous boost to think he had hired someone who could say things no one understood.

A laddish grin spread across Kydd’s face. “There we are. It’s not a pretty sight, I’m afraid.” He turned the screen around.

“It’s a grotesque from the Third State,” said Jinx, turning away.

“Why isn’t he carrying the Stick?” said Majesty. 

“During the missing hour, he must have hidden it,” said Kydd. “I’ve instructed Surveillance HQ to monitor the area with HiEyes. They’ve deployed upgraded models for enhanced clarity. Their reports are coming in every few cycles.” 

“And is their language the same as the Stick?” 

Kydd looked at the floor as if it might lessen the impact of what he was about to say. “Well, yes.” He noticed Majesty’s eyebrows rise and hastily added, “But the two never meet. There’s a rather clever system to exclude them from the Chamber of Relics.” It was a special gizmo; he liked those.

“But the Stick has been stolen. It’s no longer there.” Majesty’s eyebrows were now working independently.

“There is that, yeah, but there’s no cause for alarm,” said Kydd.

“So, despite having the look of Armageddon, it is, in fact, a walk in the park.” 

Here is the prompt that I used to create the Dataspeak spoken by the Commoners in the left hemisphere.

I inputted the following prompt into Claude via Notion: 

“Rewrite ‘Officers, can you get this man onto the scales.’ as if it was a serious scientific paper.”

And this is the result…

     "The attending officers are hereby requested to facilitate the subject's placement upon the calibrated measurement apparatus for the purpose of obtaining accurate mass data.”